Logo

Relly’s Words Of Wisdom: “Sidechicks”

Posted on June 3rd, 2011
by
Karen


See him? That’s Joey Greco from “Cheaters.” You NEVER want to see that guy running up on you out the back of a van with a camera crew because you got caught cheating on your significant other. He’s like the Chris Hansen of infidelity.

Remember the show All That? It used to come on Nickelodeon back in the day and it had Kenan and Kel on there? I always looked at it, and still do, as the kids version of In Living Color. Anyway, you remember that one portion of the show called “Vital Information For Your Everyday Life” with the chick that used to play Lydia on The Steve Harvey Show? Yeah, I know this is massive pop culture overload, but there’s a method to the madness, I promise.

Well, Lowkey’s UHTN pretty much has the same feature going on with Relly’s “140 Characters Wasn’t Enough” series. If you’ve visited the site in previous weeks then you know what it basically entails – Relly sounding off on whatever it is he feels like with no filter in sight. This Friday’s topic dealt with the controversial topic of “sidechicks.

Now, the music that should never be played with the side chick falls into 2 simple categories. First off, R&B. Absolutely NO R&B should be played while you’re chillin’ with the side chick, NONE. Not even the R&B rap songs. Imagine how much the side chick will feel misled and confused if you play, “So Into You” by Fabolous and then don’t call her the next day. There’s no comin’ back from that at all, yo. You fuck around and throw on some slow tender R&B tunes and have the side chick showing up to your job. Ne-YoChris BrownThe-Dream, stay away from ALL these niggas, The whole R&B category, unless you want the side chick expecting a foot to rub her and a date on Valentine’s Day. 

The 2nd category of music you can’t play with the side chick is of course……Drake. Yes ladies & gentleman, Mr. Bathwater himself. If you play drake with the side chick you might as well let her meet your mom, it’s OVER after that. How can you be laid up in the side chick’s crib with lines like “I Got Bath Water That You Can Soak In, Things I Can Do With Lotion” pumpin’ out the stereo,b? Then she’s gonna wonder what YOUR ass can do with lotion. Nah yo, you stay far away from Drake while you’re with the side chick. He’s not your friend in this situation; he’s your worst enemy. Let the side piece hear a line like that while she’s with you. She’s gonna think that it’s cool to start taggin’ you in all different type of pictures on facebook, b. But there’s a solution if this happens by mistake, because you know, playas fuck up. Next time you chill with her just play DMX’s first album. This will immediately get shit back to normal and put her thoughts of being number 1 to a screeching halt.

Feel free to read the entire piece over at Lowkey’s site and check out the previous entries while you’re at it. Even hit him on up Twitter when your feedback. I’m sure he’d appreciate that.

 

Comments are closed.